so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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