Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
