apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
