I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
