remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
