Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
