who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
