theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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