What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize