We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I said "one day" and that day is not today
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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