Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize