well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize