i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Randomize
