this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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