I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
