so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize