So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
