So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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