she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
