next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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