I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
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