Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
