i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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