addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
