Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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