That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize