You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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