haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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