Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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