So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
