We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
