For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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