need another drink. this is the easiest way
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize