sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
