idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize
