So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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