nut hugger
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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