Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
