One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
