More tranny stories later!
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize
