O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
