Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Never underestimate the power of titties
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
