after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
