it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
