so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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