So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize