i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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