Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
