look no pants
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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