I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
