just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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