it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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