i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I want her autograph on my taint
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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